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Confronting the Affection for His Father He Might Have Taken to the Grave
“Papa” is a song about your father, and I believe it plays a central role in the film as well. Could you tell us about the circumstances under which this song was created?
Moriyama: Actually, “Papa” started as a song titled “Mama” when I was about 18 or 19. The idea had been with me for a long time, but I couldn’t put lyrics to it for over 20 years. I thought I might offer it to someone else if the right opportunity came along. But then something happened, and I pulled this song out, changed the title to “Papa,” and suddenly the song just came together.
What was the event that triggered this?
Moriyama: My parents divorced when I was young, and I had been somewhat distant from my father since around the fifth grade. I think there were many reasons for the divorce, but my mother was a very strong presence, and since my father had married into her family, he probably felt somewhat lost. But as a child, I never wished for the divorce. Time passed like that until in 2020, during a conversation with someone, I was suddenly asked, “Did you like your father?”
That was quite a sudden question.
Moriyama: Yes. Normally, you don’t really think about whether you like or dislike your family members. So, I sort of avoided the question, saying, “Well, he’s a good person.” But then I was asked again, “Did you like him?” So I started thinking about it, and instead of just rewriting my memories, a very fundamental, early memory surfaced.
In that memory, my father was really a charming person. He loved baseball, and we would play catch together. We had a very typical father-son relationship, and I looked forward to playing with him every day. So I told that person, “I really loved him,” and I was able to acknowledge the feelings I had for my father. It made me realize that my low self-esteem came from feeling like the people closest to me were rejecting my father. And I realized that, at some point, I had been the one to reject him the most. But at that moment, I was able to be honest with myself, and it felt very healing. That’s when the lyrics for “Papa” came to me.
Facing your father’s feelings led to a deeper understanding of yourself, didn’t it? And still, it was such a sudden realization.
Moriyama: Yeah, usually, songs like this come out when someone passes away or when you can’t see them anymore. But when I wrote this song, I never imagined my father would pass away. It was more about finally being honest with feelings I had kept hidden, and that honesty sparked the creativity for the song.
Had you ever written a song about your father before that?
Moriyama: No, I hadn’t. I had always kept some distance, both physically and emotionally. “Papa” was the first time.
